The baby we lost June 20, 2008

I was looking through the items in my dresser and found the only picture I have of our baby we lost on June 20, 2008. I have wanted to hang the picture on our wall for a long time and thought now would be a good time to do so. As soon as it was hung up Joshua noticed it and went running to find me.

Joshua: Mom! I found an x-ray!
Me: (knowing what he was talking about I said) It is actually an ultrasound.
Joshua: What is it?
Me: It's a picture of mommy and daddy's baby.
Joshua: William?
Me: No it's the baby after you and before Will. The baby died and is in Heaven now.
Joshua got a concerned look on his face then started to walk away, so did I.
Joshua: What is the baby's name?
Me: Jordan.

I have thought about the baby we lost for a long time. I've thought about what stones I would want on a ring if I had every child's birth stone on it. I want one for Joshua, Will, my August 2011 baby and one for Jordan the baby we lost in 2008. I really feel it is important for me not to forget him or her. We loved that baby and still do so much that I cannot cast that baby out of our family just because we didn't get to see his/her little face. I saw his/her heart beating the day Jordan died. I am so glad I was able to and am so glad I have a picture of our baby.

Well I wasn't crying when Joshua asked about the picture but I am now. I think it is good not to forget. We love that baby just as much as Joshua, Will and my August 2011 baby, and always will.